In all the years of automotive technology, I wonder why nobody's come up with a way to honk at the person behind you in traffic.

I have a keen dislike for intentional misspellings sometimes used by businesses in an effort to be catchy or cute. The marketing effort backfires on me - the last place I want to go for a haircut is a shop called Kurls and Klaws (yes, it’s a real name). When I bought my first home - a condo - several years ago, people told me, “You could hang up a sign that says Karen’s Kondo - you know - and spell it with two Ks.” I heard this not once, but twice. I think there’s some sort of English-major-hating group that’s out to get me.

Most people seem to assume that singleness brings an endless supply of free time. While it’s true I have fewer responsibilities than my friends who have a spouse and children, that hardly means my life is unencumbered. I usually work until 6:00 in the evening. All the other tasks of life have to fit into evenings and weekends: working out, cooking, cleaning, yardwork, errands, paying bills, shopping, home improvement projects, recreation.... Probably the most out-of-touch was the man who told me how unwise it was for a woman to be out after dark, and told me his wife never shopped or ran errands after dark. If I heeded his advice, I’d have to stay home every evening, drop my gym membership, and do all of my socializing over lunch. I get the idea some people think I have the life of a stay-at-home mom, but without the kids.

I was sick on Friday - some type of flu, I think. I felt queasy all day, and couldn’t do much beyond laying around on my couch. I rented two movies to pass the time, but one was so terrible I couldn’t make it past the first 10 minutes (I should have given up after five). I read for a while, but even holding the book at eye level seemed to take considerable effort. So I resorted to television as soon as I could find an option other than soap operas, talk shows and game shows. But TV ended up being a mistake, because every commercial seemed to be one for the newest version of stuffed-crust pizza. Do you know how disgusting a greasy slab o’ pizza looks when you have the flu?

My post-college jobs have always been for non-profit organizations. I prefer it that way, but in my less altruistic moments I wish I could work for a place that has matching chairs in its conference rooms.

Sometimes I think people should have to earn a license to communicate, just as they need a license to operate a motor vehicle. Those who prove to be incompetent by their inconsiderate habits would have their license suspended. Here are what I would consider to be obvious infractions:

• Interrupting


• Correcting insignificant details. (Usually committed by spouses, as in the following exchange):
  

  She: “Last Tuesday, we tried that new Italian restaurant...”
  He: “No, it wasn’t Tuesday, it was Wednesday. Remember? It was right after we picked up the car from the mechanic.”
  She: “I thought we took the car in on Tuesday.”
  He: “No, because Tuesday I had that meeting and had to have the car to....”

  (By this time, everyone listening is ready to yell, “It’s not important!”)


• Monopolizing the conversation


• Looking around a crowded room while someone’s talking to you, in case there may be someone more interesting nearby


• Making jokes during a serious conversation


• Talking incessantly about yourself, but showing little or no interest in the other person. (Haven’t we all been on dates like that?)


• Responding to any statement with “Yeah, right.” That’s just another way of saying, “You liar.”


• Leaving notes with multiple exclamation points to convey anger. During college, I lived one summer with a roommate who was utterly sweet in person, but would leave notes like, “Do NOT put the knives with the wooden handles in the dishwasher!!!!!!!!!!!!” (After a few of these, I should have left my own note saying, “I’m moving OUT!!!!!!!!!!”)

Of course, there are other communication quirks that are annoying but not necessarily rude. For those, they should just let you off with a warning.

Toy Story 2 on Ice looks a tad silly, with twin Buzz Lightyears joining hands and twirling about. One of my friends thinks the “on ice” adaptations of popular movies has gone too far: “What will they come up with next? Titanic on Ice?”

As I continue to battle insomnia, I’ve stooped to occasionally watching “She Spies.” It’s pretty hokey, but it’s a show that knows it’s hokey - which somehow helps the entertainment value. It’s actually pretty funny at times. Besides, at 3 in the morning, you can’t be too picky.

Why do guys think they have to come up with an answer to any question, whether they know what it is or not? Isn’t responding with a simple “I don’t know” preferable to making something up? A (male) friend of mine refers to this as Male Answer Syndrome.

I was up until 5:00 this morning, working on a deadline, and I am not a night person. I hope I won’t end up being a complete grouch today.

I heard a taped speech by Frank Abagnale, the subject of the film Catch Me If You Can a few years ago. Captivated by his story, I searched the Phoenix Public Libary system for his book, and found a single battered copy at a small branch in Paradise Valley. So of course I was thrilled when the film came out. I saw it over the weekend, and liked it a lot. It’s a terrific cat-and-mouse movie with great acting and some surprisingly touching moments. And the 60’s-style opening credits are oh-so-cool. Unfortunately, I didn't find out until afterward that Abagnale himself has a bit part in the movie. Guess I’ve found my excuse to go see it again....

Today’s helpful cooking tip is courtesty of the instruction booklet for my new George Foreman Lean Mean Fat Reducing Grilling Machine: After the desired amount of time, the food should be done.

Today's date is 1-2-3.

Cool.